Thursday, March 15, 2012

Celebrating Two Years Since HM's Grand Opening

I'm sure Rich, better known as, Hotel Melanoma's Proprietor, will celebrate HM's second anniversary Monday March 19th his own way. But I will be leaving early that morning and getting home late that night and I'll miss any celebrations. And since, as a pastor, I never know what my days will look like, I figure I better do this now while I can!

March 19, 2010, he opened Hotel Melanoma and ever since then he has put his own spin on Rock-N-Roll classics along with some disco favorites. His first song was The Eagles Hotel California. So I've done to him what he does to others. I took his spin of his theme song and put my own twist to it and an extra ending.



Off a dark mountain highway, cool dude, short of  hair
Sweet smell of new sunscreen, filling up all the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw the hotel’s bright light
Tired bod grew heavy, sleepy eyes grew dim
I had to stop for the night.


There he stood in the doorway;
I heard the welcome bell
And I was thinking to myself
‘This could be heaven or this could be Hell’
Then he picked up my suitcase and he showed me the way
There were others down the corridor,
I know I heard them say…


Welcome to the Hotel Melanoma
Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)
What a lovely case.
Plenty of friends at the Hotel Melanoma
Any time of year (any time of year) you can find them here

Some minds are Ativan-twisted, some got the Thorazine bends
We got a lot of pretty, pretty docs, that we calls friends
No one tans in the courtyard, no summer sweat
Our tans we remember, though we try to forget


Well I called up management,
‘My room is just fine’
He said, ‘you are welcome to stay here but you must grow a spine’
And still warriors are calling from down the hall,
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say…


Welcome to the Hotel Melanoma
Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)
Such a lovely case
They livin’ it up at the Hotel Melanoma
What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise), doors are open wide


Strobe lights on the ceiling,
Got pink Zofran on ice
And Rich said, ‘we will always be patients here, of our own device’
And in the hotel’s diner,
We gathered for a feast
We stab it with our steely knives
But we just can’t kill the beast


Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before
‘Relax’ said the owner,
‘We are programmed to receive.
You can check out any time you like,
But you can never leave!’


So we’re livin’ large at the Hotel Melanoma
Any time of year, you can find us here
Rich is spinnin’ songs at the Hotel Melanoma
Since Two-thousand ten
Do you remember then?

Though I wish there were not a need for Hotel Melanoma, Rich opened this establishment and does his best for us.

And I am grateful!